Oh, hey, our review copy of Mega Man 9 arrived today. Oh, hey, it’s for print only. Oh. Hey. Our reviews editor poached it. Curse my empty life.
Well, I did manage to swipe it long enough to take it for a spin through one level I’d never played before, and…you know, it’s funny. The Internet is convinced that I’m utterly inept at video games because I’ve panned crummy titles like Ultimate Ghosts ‘N Goblins and Yoshi’s Island DS, incapable of making the connection that I don’t dislike them because they’re hard but rather because they’re badly made and their challenge stems largely from poor design. It’s a significant difference! But I loved Bionic Commando Rearmed, and I see myself going after far too many Mega Man 9 achievements for my own good. I played through Galaxy Man’s stage (simply because he had the weirdest-looking portrait and I believe that those are different from us should be destroyed) and aside from a single trick trap that will almost certainly kill everyone their first time through, I breezed through the level and took down the man (well, Man) himself on my first attempt.
Based on this I think it’s safe to say that I’m only capable of excelling at twitch games whose patterns and strategies were burned into my neurons twenty years ago. I may be too old a dog to master new tricks, but I’m quite good at the old ones, it seems.
Also, in case you missed the Retronauts that went up earlier, you really should give it a listen. While I’m the first to be critical of the show, this episode came out incredibly well — doubly surprising given its patchwork, improvisational assembly and preposterous length. But the quality of the guests helps, and so too does the fact that each of the four segments has a markedly different tone from the rest; despite talking about Dreamcast matters with two different groups for nearly two hours, there’s very little of the same ground covered between the two segments. I take no credit for its quality myself; I simply gave good things an excuse to coalesce into audible form.