Blade Runner: The Final Cut
I assume that everyone reading this is interested in Blade Runner. The only question is, which version of Blade Runner will you get? On DVD, we have the two-disc Final Cut, which includes the film re-edited by Ridley Scott to include everything he couldn't include before. The previous Director's Cut was a misnomer, as Scott was never happy with that version -- he had very little time to finish it before its scheduled release date and didn't have full access to all the materials he wanted to include. Also on the two-disc edition is the feature-length documentary Dangerous Days: The Making of Blade Runner. The Final Cut has three different commentaries, including one by Ridley Scott. If you've heard his other commentaries, you know that his comments are much more informative than the normal fluff we get from other, lesser directors.

Sounds like a good deal, right? Ah, but then there's the four-disc Collector's Edition, containing both the Final Cut and the documentary, as well the International Cut (similar to the Theatrical Cut but with a few alternate lines and more shots of graphic violence), the aforementioned Theatrical Cut, the Director's Cut, and a full disc of featurettes, images, and marketing ephemera.

And if that weren't enough Blade Runner for you, there's also a five-disc Ultimate Collector's Edition that has all of the previously listed items plus the elusive and highly-valued Workprint Version. This edition of the film can be viewed with commentary by the author of the fantastic Future Noir: The Making of Blade Runner, an amazing book I've read quite a few times.

Now, go forth and gorge yourself on what might be the finest and most comprehensive home video package ever released!

The Simpsons Movie
We all love Spider-pig -- not to be mistaken for Peter Porker, the Spectacular Spider-ham -- and now we can watch his amazing adventures from the comfort of our own home. Also, something something rest of the movie.

Stardust
While perhaps not the finest possible example of Neil Gaiman's work, Stardust is a throwback to the days of lighter fantasy films best represented by the fantastic The Princess Bride. The film has little in common with today's Lord of the Rings coat-tail riders, which makes for a nice change of pace. Charming in its way, its sly humor and simple pleasures don't equal the heights reached by Princess Bride -- but fans of the Dread Pirate Roberts would definitely find Stardust worthy of a rental.

Halloween
Rob Zombie completely misses the point. The very definition of unnecessary, I might call this trainwreck the most chilling example this week of Hollywood's complete lack of originality. If only it weren't for...

Rush Hour 3
Rush Hour 3 makes three Rush Hours too many.

Sadly, I lied. This isn't even the most glaring example of Hollywood's pitiful creative failings this week. No, that honor (?) goes to...

Cinderella II
Disney doesn't deserve Pixar. Seriously. Every great franchise in the Disney library has been beaten, slathered with bright red lipstick, forced into an ill-fitting miniskirt, and put out on the street to turn tricks until, bleeding and ruined, they cease to be profitable or beloved and are taken out behind the woodshed to be put of out of their misery. Luckily, Disney's board of directors seems to have realized the incredible damage that crap like this does to the company's reputation, and Disney has pledged to stop pushing out so many cheaply-made violations of what were once cherished childhood memories. Thank you, Steve Jobs.

The Good Stuff: Le Chevalier d’Eon: Volume 6 – Bete Noire
Le Chevalier d’Eon is a sort of historical fantasy about a real-life figure in 18th-century French espionage: Charles de Beaumont. The series blends some not-based-on-real-life magic and monsters with the political intrigue, and the general consensus is that it’s pretty good. I haven’t seen it myself, but if you’re into the historical fiction genre, this might be a pretty good choice for you. Wonder if they included the parts about Beaumont being a crossdresser? Aw, it's anime. Of course they did.

The Bad Stuff: The Wallflower Volume 1 | Lesson 1: My Fair Bishounen
My apologies to the romance fans (or fans of the original manga) in the audience, but we simply must take a moment to groan in horror at the tagline on this box, the volume name, and the geez are they boys or women!? factor.

Sure, I realize that this release is pandering to the teenage girl set, hard, but I have a hard time believing that even younger teenage girls are vapid enough to think something with a tagline like “Ultimate Hostile Makeover” is cool. And if they are, keep it to yourself. Please, don’t shatter my illusions.