Grindhouse Presents: Death Proof
Released to theaters as one half of a double feature, Quentin Tarantino's contribution to Grindhouse is now extended and on home video as a single release. A throwback to the '70s style of exploitation/horror, Tarantino is treading familiar ground. Everybody's dream casting choice for Solid Snake, Kurt Russel, is excellent and makes an otherwise forgettable entry for Tarantino watchable.

Bloodrayne 2
This is how the rest of the world sees video games. I guess you could watch this for the eye candy -- or you could just play some video games and try and forget that this even exists. Huh. Seems familiar, somehow.

Condemned
Stone Cold Steve Austin in The Condemned is no Rowdy Roddy Piper in They Live. Only hardcore wrestling fans need apply -- if you're not too busy sniffing glue and shoplifting from the Piggly Wiggly. (I kid! I kid, wrestling fans! Stop hurting me now.)

Lucky You
Ugh. Every week, I have to write some bologna in this column about some lame romantic comedy. It's Drew Barrymore, you've seen 100 movies just like it before, if that appeals to you, then go forth! Go forth and waste your money!

Superman: Doomsday
Remember all the hype when they "killed" Superman? Well, I guess that overwrought, over hyped and phony pop culture event has been made into an animated movie. Look at the bright side, Superman fans -- it can't be as bad as Superman Returns, can it?

We Are Marshall
A nonfiction tale of a plane crash that killed most of a college football team, and its aftermath in the local community.

Commando
One of my earliest memories of film is watching Arnold throw a pipe through a guy's gut, and hearing Arnold quip, "Let off some steam, Bennett". I also remember him throwing a circular at a guy so hard that the top of the guy's head comes clean off. Dumb action movies used be to be so good. Wha' happen!?

Troy
I've only seen this once, in the theater, and I found it incredibly disappointing. However, it has enough fans to justify a rerelease with an extended cut and copious amounts of special features to shove down your eye-holes.

Wall Street
"The richest one percent of this country owns half our country's wealth, five trillion dollars. One third of that comes from hard work, two thirds comes from inheritance, interest on interest accumulating to widows and idiot sons and what I do, stock and real estate speculation. It's bullshit. You got ninety percent of the American public out there with little or no net worth. I create nothing. I own. We make the rules, pal. The news, war, peace, famine, upheaval, the price per paper clip. We pick that rabbit out of the hat while everybody sits out there wondering how the hell we did it. Now you're not naive enough to think we're living in a democracy, are you buddy? It's the free market. And you're a part of it. You've got that killer instinct. Stick around pal, I've still got a lot to teach you." -- Gordon Gekko, Wall Street.