Games | Weekly Game Releases | Week of Aug. 28, 2007: Welcome again to Coming Soon for the week of August 28th. This week sees the release of one of the Wii's most anticipated titles, as well as two major PS3 releases. Shouldn't we be more excited than we are?

List compiled by reibeatall and Sarcasmorator | Posted August 28, 2007

Game of the week | Metroid Prime 3: Corruption

Samus Aran has to fight more Metroids and Space Pirates -- along with the shrill keening of enraged fanboys -- in her first Wii adventure, which appears to be a more action-oriented take on the series than usual. She'll visit numerous worlds, collect multitudinous items and destroy myriad monsters, all under the iron grip of the Wii Remote's motion control. Instead of locking on and shooting, now you'll be pointing around and shooting. This is the end of the Prime trilogy, so we're betting that instead of another cliffhanger involving Dark Samus, the Metroid Hatchling will kick the bezebes out of her evil half this time around, clearing the way for the events of Metroid II, Super Metroid and Metroid Fusion. And, uh, Dread.

Also appearing in stores


Done up by Factor 5, the folks behind the Rogue Squadron games, Lair is kind of the same thing, only with dragons instead of X-Wings. Now, the last time we had a knight-riding-a-dragon action franchise, it was Drakengard, and it wasn't much good. Reviews for this one so far are middling -- should we proclaim the start of a trend? Seems as though the game has lotsa purdy graphics, but is a bit lacking in the control department. But, you know, for such a powerful system the PS3 is still pretty short on sweetness these days. For the faithful, no doubt, eye candy will do.


Warhawk was there waaaaaaay back when the first PlayStation was starting to build up steam. On PS2, the eponymous aircraft made a cameo as the incongruous end boss of Twisted Metal: Black. And at long last, there's a new Warhawk game, this one on PS3 and of the downloadable variety. (There's also a boxed version that costs a few bills more but comes with a Bluetooth headset. And a box. Nerds do so love their boxes.) The game's recent beta version was popular and well-received, and the game's metamorphosis from E3 demo with tacked-on motion controls to online-only multiplayer scrum looks complete.

Tiger Woods' PGA Tour 2008

Grab your 5-iron and head down to the links in yearly mainstream golf game. This year they've added a few things. First, there's GamerNet, a (an?) YouTube type program where you can compete in challenges (or just play your game) and tell all your friends how much they suck and how they can never be as awesome as you. To help with identifying yourself, they've also included GameFace, something similar to what we've seen in other games such as Rainbow Six: Vegas, wherein you can upload a picture of your face onto your character.

But it is still golf.

Wild Arms 5 After two decent RPGs, two crappy RPGs, and one crappy remake, the Wild Arms series returns. Can this wild west series hit it big for its 10th birthday? With a script penned by Japanese author Kaori Kurosaki, it's possible. Plus, it's got branching paths!

Dynasty Warriors Gundam

Two of Japan's chief exports, Gundams and Dynasty Warriors, come together to make Dynasty Warriors Gundam. It's amazing how KOEI could come up with such a creative and compelling title for this game; I would have called it "Zeta Robots on a Field Blowing Up Other Robots Team Wing 008th." Continuity be damned, they've taken Gundams from all the Gundam anime and thrown them into a new story wrought with cheesy one-liners and back-stabbing. Also, it doesn't really make sense. Regardless of the naming conventions or the storyline of the game, people will eat it up. There are no doubts about what this game is, though. This IS Dynasty Warriors with a coat of Gundam paint. Basic gameplay will consist of XXXXXXXXXXXXXXB XXXBBXXXXXX AXXXXXXXXXXB B(charge attack) XXXXXXB XXXXXXXXXXXXX Y(super attack) XXXXXX AA XXXB XXXXXB XXB XB. (Note, button combinations were created using the Xbox 360 version. The PS3's button scheme will be different.)

Moto GP 2007

In lieu of a description, the author wishes instead to share with his readers the sounds of a race in Moto GP 2007. Please be aware that this was taken in 5.1 surround sound.


Blue Dragon

Created by the terrific threesome of Hironobu Sakaguchi, Akira Toriyama, and Nobuo Uematsu, this game had a lot going for it. Hell, the last time these three guys got together they made one of the best RPGs of all time. Unfortunately, this game doesn't quite live up to Chrono Trigger's standards. With gameplay that feels more like Dragon Quest and art that looks like everything else Toriyama has ever done, this game's pretty standard fare.

Naruto: Ultimate Ninja Heroes

Has DragonBall-Z been dethroned? Is the dynasty of grunting, spike-haired dudes doomed? The onslaught of Naruto seems to be heralding an end to the reign of Goku. With 3 PS2 games (another coming out next week), 2 Gamecube games, 2 GBA games, and 1 DS game released in the states, Mr. Uzumaki seems like he's here to stay for a while. This fighting game for the PSP is a port of Naruto: Ultimate Ninja for the PS2, with added team battles and wi-fi. Basic gameplay consists of depleting your opponent's health bar with martial arts moves. It's clear that the license sells this game. Believe it!

Wild West

Welcome to the Wild West, where you can be either a Fox-man or a freaky green lizardy dude with a tail! Shoot ruffians, play darts, collect gold and stop a runaway train. You can even do something involving alcohol. I'm not sure who the target audience is for this game, but I'm sure they're going to be disappointed. Except maybe the "lovers of awful games" niche. This is their lucky day!

Garfield's Nightmare

Everybody's favorite fat orange comic cat is back in a terrific(ly terrible budget) release from The Games Factory. After literally eating himself into a coma, the morbidly obese feline must explore his nightmare world and find an alarm clock to wake himself up. A thinly veiled allegory for modern American culture, or just another crappy game? Hell, why not both?

Carnival Games

The title says it all! Step right up and win a virtual prize, all without having to step onto a broiling hot fairground or try to outfox a crafty carnie for a crappy stuffed animal or dead goldfish or obnoxious fat kids whose faces are smeared with the grease of fried turkey legs and funnel cakes. Translation: 20 or so mini-games based on classic carnival games.

Stuntman: Ignition

Available for the Xbox 360, PS3 and PS2, this sequel sees you trying for the perfect flaming crash to immortalize on celluloid. Except not really, because the movies being made in this game are fake! So, fake celluloid, then. It looks sort of like Burnout, except with even less emphasis on the racing and more on the zoom-and-boom.

Professional Fisherman's Tour: Northern Hemisphere

It's fishing. It's cheap. It's on DS. That must be a lure for somebody, but it's hard to say who precisely will take the bait. The main benefits of fishing are 1) fresh air and proximity to nature and 2) fish. This game provides neither, which leaves us worried that it might turn out to be a sinker.

Monster Hunter Freedom 2

Set out to tame the wilds and hunt down monsters and gather lots of treasure, Diablo-style, in the second of the series to hit the PSP. Luckily, this time around there's support for infrastructure mode; unluckily, it's only for downloading new content, which is all the evidence you need that Capcom's totally missing the whole point of Diablo-style hackathons: Playing with your friends over the Internets.

ATTN PUBLISHERS: Ad hoc doesn't cut it.

Honda SBK-07: Superbike World Championship

It's motorcycle racing. It's cheap. It's on PS2. And that's basically all there is to know about this game, apparently. Oh, wait. It allows for up to two players to race at once. We shall henceforth call this futuristic feature... "Multiplayer." Write that down, we're gonna be famous.

Weekly WTF? | Crazy Frog Arcade Racer

A racing game based upon a cell phone sound. I kid you not. Imagine playing this.; at 00:38, you see digital frog penis. I never thought I'd type those words in that order. Buyer beware: this game contains generic gameplay that will force you to regret the purchase.

And that's it for this week. Tune in next time for more games that nobody really wants to play, and maybe one that a few people will pick up. Until then, here's a screen grab from the great franchise mashup, "Lonesome Gundam."

Now we know how the West was won: Giant robots.

Pick up Metroid and wanna talk about it? Then come to the Fun Club thread for this week!