I can tell I’m getting old

I’ve become unreasonably excited about furniture.


We finally installed the bedside table I bought last summer, and it’s just the greatest thing. It has a three-step light built in to its underside that can be activated or dimmed by tapping a sensor on its side, casting low illumination onto the floor so you can get up in the middle of the night without fear of stubbing your toes yet without the need to turn on a bright light to assail your poor eyes. It also has power outlets built into the drawer, with small alcoves for devices like a phone and a 3DS.

This thing is the best. When I die, an event that looms nearer with each passing day, I want to be set adrift with this as the burning boat that bears my corpse upon the ocean currents.

Tomorrow: I show off my extensive collection of soft flocked coat hangars and share my favorite Metamucil recipes.

6 thoughts on “I can tell I’m getting old

  1. Got a link/model for that bedside table, assuming it’s not bespoke? I’ve been looking for one myself and that one seems way, way better than anything I was planning on getting.

  2. Do you have a link to the table? It sounds very interesting to me (even if my wife would probably think it wouldn’t fit into the bedroom’s style)…

  3. I actually like furniture like that.
    I mean, I don’t use floor lights to get around in the dark. I instead hone my kickolocation skills. But otherwise that furniture seems like exactly the kind of thing I would want to acquire if I were still accumulating wealth instead of treading water.

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