A reintroduction

I haven’t really mentioned it yet, but the days of multi-person blogging at GameSpite are over. There’ll still be articles aplenty, but it’s once again up to me to keep the front page interesting using nothing but the powers of my highly-developed mind. Perhaps not coincidentally, traffic has dipped somewhat since everyone else bowed out! There’s no real reason for the change beside the fact that the blogging experiment had run its course, and it seemed to confuse a number of readers when we had a bunch of posts by me with occasional interjections by others. So, this is a simplification of sorts. It’s also a chance for the other writers to focus on things they enjoy more, while I can get back to the proverbial basics… whatever that means.

For starters, I recently experienced the alarming realization that this site is read by an awful lot of people who are newly-drafted and have no idea what a ToastyFrog is. Even though a whole bunch of people still access the site through the toastyfrog.com domain! Something about that just doesn’t seem right. So:

ToastyFrog (real name: Tostifer) is the former mascot of a site created to cash in on the Internet boom. When the Internet imploded at the beginning of the decade and dragged his sponsor down along with it, Toasty never really figured out what to do next. He’s not lazy, and he’s not stupid; he’s just naive, and remarkably unambitious. This could probably be attributed to self-consciousness about the fact that he’s a freakish frog-thing and doesn’t really fit in with the average crowd. He’s surprisingly good-natured despite his acute awareness that he’s a twisted parody of humankind, but he does tend to keep to himself and hasn’t made many friends. He spends most of his time playing and replaying old videogames, since they’re a nearly limitless source of free (if not entirely legal) entertainment. When he does venture out in public, he always wears baggy, hooded sweatshirts that obscure his features enough to cause those around him to assume he’s a kid with an unpleasant skin condition rather than a grotesque abomination of nature.

His ultimate goal in life is to do something awesome, but since he’s not really sure what precisely that would entail he’s content to keep whiling away his time and freeloading off his impressively tolerant “hostess.”

23 thoughts on “A reintroduction

  1. Double post: the comment section seems buggier than usual! I just deleted a post that had a name attached to it, saying something about Tostifer clinging to a rock in the middle of a stream for several years…

  2. The idea that people might not know who ToastyFrog is saddens my heart. They would probably just stare at you blankly if you asked them about the GIA.

  3. Actually, mouth beef is what you get when your breakfast is one of those cereals that doesn’t soften very quickly in milk (e.g. Oh’s) and shreds the skin on your upper palate. Nasty.

  4. Guys, it’s Vitaman. And Capn Crunch

    Also, there’s no period after the Dr in Dr Pepper.

    Why yes I was raised by a packed of feral copy editors thanks for asking.

  5. Hi Jeremy, just wanted to say I love the drawing of toastyfrog in this post. You’ve definitely crossed mediocre.

  6. I thought Rorita was doing the freeloading part, being an exchange student and all that.

  7. I’ve been coming to the site for years and I’m not even sure I knew this backstory

  8. I keep forgetting it’s possible to access this site through anything BUT toastyfrog.com… but then of course I have this weird aversion to updating links.

    Anyway though, on the no more other bloggers front, I don’t mean to come off like a total jerk saying this, but I’m kind of glad to hear that. Personal blogs are the sort of thing where generally I swing by to hear what that particular person is rambling about on a given day, so it’s downright jarring to see someone else’s ramblings, entertaining though they may be. Kind of like getting shrimp cocktail when you ordered a chocolate sunday. It’s good, it’s in the right little pedestal-bowl, but it’s not what you were expecting to see. Plus, switching out of bad metaphor mode, there’s people’s respective links right down there.

  9. Yeah, I still access it through toastyfrog. I’d also been wondering where all the other contributors had got to in recent days. I see. I see.

  10. I suppose the universe really is cyclical. We’ve gone from it being Toastyfrog.com with the frog and Rorita everywhere to your literally having written a story where he drowned in a river and renaming the site and getting a bunch of other bloggers on the site and now we’re back to you and the frog. Neat.

  11. Wait…I’ve been fired!?

    Also lol@ “Why yes I was raised by a packed of feral copy editors thanks for asking.”

  12. And thus a whole new generation began to mistakenly associate ToastyFrog and Parish as the same person.

    Is that a recent drawing? It’s really great!

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