Slow as Christmas

I’ve always wondered what the phrase “slow as Christmas” is supposed to mean, but now I know — I’m staying at my grandparents’ place for Christmas, and the Internet service appears to be wi-fi router linked to a dial-up modem connection.

It’s great to be here, though. It certainly beats the sketchy Dallas motel we stayed at last night, with its interior design plucked straight from the black heart of 1972:


By a crazy coincidence, 1972 is also the last time the room appears to have been cleaned:


Mmm, giant cobwebs.

But anyway, Merry Christmas to all. May your holiday be cobweb-free. And if you don’t celebrate Christmas either…well, Merry Christmas regardless, and I also hope you have a damn fine pagan or religious celebration of your choosing. And if you don’t celebrate anything, enjoy your day off! And if you don’t have the day off, well, sorry that everyone else is so chipper and annoying.

8 thoughts on “Slow as Christmas

  1. Nah, Christmas Day in retail is actually a pretty sweet deal. It’s a short day, it’s not that busy, everyone is really laid back, and we score some sweet, sweet holiday pay.

    I work tomorrow, and yeah, while a day off would be nice, it should be about as fun as a day at work gets.

  2. Today shouldn’t be too bad at work, it’s only 8 hours. The next two days, however, are going to be murder – 11 hours each, more if I want overtime (they’re offering).

    Merry Christmas!

  3. Because I’m the fool who isn’t going to be celebrating anything, except perhaps a small case of sinus infection, those who drive through my little coffee stand today will still be able to get their much needed caffeine, so that they’re able to tolerate their families.

    Merry Christmas.

  4. You didn’t go to Vegas for the weekend by any chance? I saw someone who looked like Parish with an asian girlfriend boarding the Vegas flight at San Jose International last Friday, and thought ‘nah’, he’d be going back to Lubbock or wherever he grew up.

  5. I sat at work yesterday for Christmas (Japan), but it wasn’t all bad. I got to bring everyone candy canes at least.

  6. I’m with my wife at my Mother-in-law’s. I’m spending every waking hour playing Chrono Trigger DS. Thanks, Mom-in-law for buying from my Amazon wish list instead of knitting me a scarf!

  7. I am known for my bad/archaic tastes so I am fully-aware of how shameful this is, but I kinda love that crazy random 1972-ish room divider. It’s so ugly and random, how can I not? Cobwebs aside.

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