Marvel(ous) team-up

I appeared in a, um, comedy segment, I guess? On the debut episode of the new 1UP FM podcast, formerly EGM Live*. It’s basically 10 minutes of me talking about bobservo’s feature on the five worst J-RPG character names ever and tossing out my own suggestions. Perhaps unsurprisingly, Legend of Dragoon offers the single most awful name imaginable — a name so intrinsically terrible that everyone I’ve mentioned it to has burst out laughing. Thanks, Sony, for an RPG so lousy we’re still laughing about it nearly a decade later.

Also, the Spore verdict:

Alarmingly accurate, yet nauseatingly wrong. In other words, I’m sold.

18 thoughts on “Marvel(ous) team-up

  1. Awesome Parish! Hopefuly my EB Games will receive their disk copies of Spore tomorrow. Man, the Creature Creator will be the first “real” game I’ll install to my 3 month old Macbook Pro!

  2. You know, some people actually like Legend of Dragoon. Thankfully, I am not one of them. Even at the tender age of 17, I recognized a ripoff when I was saw one. Sadly, I actually paid $50 for it. Dark days.

    Also, the name “Fayt Leingod” almost single-handedly put me off Star Ocean 3. The dull environments and characters did the rest. I think I would still be playing today if his name was indeed Destiny McJesus.

  3. The only memory of Legend of Dragoon I have is of my college roommate’s TV blaring out “VOLCANOOO!” during every fight.

  4. Hahaha, I almost forgot about the shouts they make when they attack. Though nothing quite beats hearing the delightfully Engrishy “Madness… HEROOOO!!”

  5. I enjoy Legend of the Dragoon in the same way people enjoy B-movies, only completely unlike that because I’m not even ironic about it. The game has flaw piled upon flaw piled upon flaw (including bad names and awkward post-attack shouts), and it’s probably one of my favorite games ever, anyway. I play it at least once every 18 months.

    What I’m trying to say is, my brain is broken.

  6. Say what you will about Legend of Dragoon, but it is the most unintentionally hilarious game EVER. Seriously, bring a couple friends over, start a new game, and have each of you make crazy, over-the-top voices for every character. This is especially funny when you find out about half of the characters are gay (or when you see the king say “don’t tease me!”

  7. Legend of Dragoon will stick with me forever, if simply for that motherfucker Plos who sits and watches your village while it burns and you leave.

  8. This is a long shot, but anybody remember the female character “Jennister”? I have no idea what game the name appears in, but it’s an instant classic.

  9. Considering I sank something like 50 hours into Legend of Dragoon 9 years ago or whatever, I think I should be able to remember more than “VOLCANOOOO,” but I don’t. I’m not sure if that relfects worse on the game, or on my high school self.

  10. Shellshock!: I think it’s Jessifer, and it’s from a survival horror game called Carrier. Yeap, it’s one of “those” crappy DC survival horror games.

  11. Man you guys are crazy, the best thing they yelled during fights was “Gust of Wind Dance!”, because that totally strikes fear into your enemies.

  12. Having never played Legend of Dragoon, could someone tell me what the “single most awful name imaginable” referred to is?

  13. Ohhh, I didn’t see the podcast link. I automatically tune out anything associated with podcasts. :( I’ll listen to it when I’m at a computer with speakers.

  14. Needs a followup featuring the worst JRPG place names ever. The NES version of Dragon Warrior 3 had a town called Assaram.

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