You say you want a retro-lution

You people can stop demanding a new Retronauts podcast — episode 28 is up. I haven’t had a chance to listen to this one, and I had no involvement whatsoever with its creation, so I can’t vouch for it. But Sharkey hates it, which means he’s already turned into me! So you should listen to it just to witness his bizarre metamorphosis for yourself. Next up: He’ll stop cussin’, drinkin’ and smokin’ and become a boring, quiet person who blogs too often.

In news of things I am involved in, I’ve been feeling that old itch to create a game lately. I was building up some big, ambitious plans last spring, but then my grandfather passed away right as I was warming up to the task and suddenly I didn’t really feel like working on it anymore.

It’s been long enough now that the negative associations have faded, and I’d love nothing more than to play a good game and be able to think, “Hey, I did this.” Of course, I’m no Pixel, so I’m open to help. I have a story and general gameplay in mind, but no clue how the hell to go about actually, you know, creating it. If anyone out there loves creating 2D sprite art or producting retro-sounding music and doesn’t mind contributing to a project that will almost certainly make no one any money ever, let me know. Better yet, send me a link to your portfolio. Once I put this thing into motion, I’d like to chronicle its creation on the site, or maybe on 1UP. I dunno. Seems like a bunch of amateurs floundering around trying to make a video game could be pretty interesting. Or at the very least, charming in its pathos.

Contrary to previous indications, the game — which I’m currently calling The Venture — is not about ToastyFrog. I think he’d be better in an RPG than a platformer, so maybe that will be my second project. (Say, ten years from now, when the first game is finally either finished or abandoned. But maybe I shouldn’t be so fatalistic about these things?)

38 thoughts on “You say you want a retro-lution

  1. Happy about the return of Retronauts, bummed that you’re getting off at this stop.

    Regardless of what Sharkey does with the podcast, we’ll all miss you, ya lug.

  2. Wait, who says Parish isn’t doing Retronauts anymore?! This tangent-following sensationalism is just the kind of thing he’s opposed to!

  3. New Retronauts… Not so much. I don’t know why you left but the show could use you. Your the one that keeps it on track and for better or worse, your less snarky than Sharky (unintentional rhyme). I found the new show boring and absent of character. The music was no good in this episode and Jen dominated the conversation with being unable to remember things they said only minutes earlier. Okay I’ll stop. Miss your stuff, wish the show hadn’t changed.

  4. This is great news, I can’t wait to start hearing about this game. I wish I could help but I don’t think I’ll have much to offer to this project. I do have a hobby programming though if such knowledge is ever needed.

    No doubt this game will herald in the usage of the term ‘megamanathon-roidvania’ as a video game genre.

  5. Gunstar Super Heroes a *MISS*? What the hell have they’ve been smoking? Sure, it’s not as good as the original, but on its won it’s a solid portable title.

    Same thing with Advance Guardian Heroes. Stop comparing these games with the original.

    And where the hell is Parish?

  6. That’s funny, I was just thinking this morning about what a letdown Super Heroes was. Treasure couldn’t make up its mind whether it wanted to create a remake or a sequel, so it barfed up something that wasn’t really either and lacked pretty much everything good about the original. Talk about going through the motions.

  7. I’d consider Super Heroes a remake, set in another universe (Earth instead of Gunstar 9). Sure, it isn’t what you’d come to expect for a game with the title of “Gunstar” in it, but I appriciate the different take, and I think it’s better than most other handheld action games out there…

    Also, the show was better with you in it. I hate to say, but it has become unbearable ever since you’ve left. The pacing of the show is just awful, and it kind of reminds me of G4 TechTV when G4 completely took over.

  8. Ahhh, game creation. I still have a copy of RPG Maker somewhere simply because the idea appeals so much, complete lack of time to work on it regardless.

    So, uh. I’m not much of a pixel-art person, but if you’d like somebody to contribute the odd piece of art, I could possibly do stuff.

  9. Quit the comic book stuff Parish and focus on those thumbnail theaters. Come on, I wanna see you do Lost! Grey’s Anatomy? You could make a thumbnail theater video game, where players create their own little funnies that are tested against an evil monster who can only be beaten by laughter. Hahaha! That’s a pet project that could really revolutionize the world.

  10. As a fan of the original Gunstar Heroes, i wasn’t too pleased with the gba sequel either.

  11. This was one of the worst Retronauts ever. Come back, seriously.

    The game’s a platformer? When I read the first line I automatically thought “probably an RPG”

    Good luck with it

  12. Man, what the hell, people. Give Sharkey a chance to establish his own approach to Retronauts. His first few episodes have been way better than my first few episodes.

    As for Thumbnail Theatre, it was fun… 10 years ago. I did as much with the idea as I could and stop when it wasn’t enjoyable anymore. The end.

  13. I can be your third-string composer as my dabblings in music are many years removed, but I can certainly crank out some stuff if you can’t find anyone else (not to inspire too much confidence, of course).

  14. Hello. Do you have a programmer? I have been working on a Paper Mario-ish engine (inspired by the sheep in the Modest Mouse video) for a Contra clone for a while, but have trouble drawing characters who look the same person from one pose to the next. Good luck on your project, I’ve been waiting for your video game since you were on that free hosting site.

  15. I’d love to contribute to your game in anyway that I can, but my skills in the music creation and also the art creation department aren’t up to snuff. That’s why I’ve been looking into Level Design on my own. So if you need help in any part but music and art, drop me a line. I once made a game where you click a ghost, and also a plane shooter with no end. Good times.

  16. >Seems like a bunch of amateurs floundering around trying to make a video game…
    … fails in 99% of all cases. Especially over the Internet.

    Prove me wrong.

  17. People trying to do anything fail in 99% of all cases. But you have to make the effort.

  18. Parish, I’d love to help with your game in any way I can. But the two of us seem to have very identical skillsets, so like… I dunno, if you need another pair of eyes playing the game and polishing, give me a call.

  19. “This was one of the worst Retronauts ever. Come back, seriously.”

    Huh. While I felt the topic itself was kind of ho-hum, I thought the actual dialogue therein was both awesome and hilarious. Two thumbs up.

  20. You should try Gamemaker if you do have an idea that revolves around traditional concepts. The Lite edition is free, but the more sophisticated one is $20. I don’t know if it’s around your budget…

  21. A quixotic attempt at subverting the dominant paradigm, led by the perennial champion of the most quixotic would-be-genre ever? Where do I sign up?

    Oh, right, I guess that’d be the door marked “you must be THIS SKILLED to ride this attraction”. Alls I can offer are my (rather filmic/theatrical) skills in plotting/writing/dialogue etc, which I sense may be among your own stronger suits anyways. However, if you want a second ear on any of that sorta stuff, don’t hesitate…

  22. Regarding the game project, I’m pretty curious. I have fun mapping out levels when I’m bored and wouldn’t mind seeing whether I actually have any skill at it or if I should put my doodle paper to better use.

    As for the podcast, I rather like the fact that Sharkey does hardly any editing. Sometimes my favorite parts of any given episode are the tangential rants and miscommunications, and I think perhaps there’s a bit TOO much editing in Jeremy’s hands. When you finish that Retronauts Season 1 boxset, they better be the Full Monty, y’hear?

  23. I have sent you an e-mail regarding sprite art.
    Just in case your e-mail is a marsh through which you do not regularly tread.

  24. Gredlen’s comment made me realize that I should probably say that I sent you an email regarding music, last night.

  25. I sent you an email regarding the programming aspect. Sounds like it could be fun.

  26. I could possibly do some music for it. What kind of music are you looking for, a retro-ish, sort of NES-like sound or something?

    I don’t really have a portfolio of music to show, but if you like I could try and make a couple of demo-type tracks if you give me more information about the musical style you’re looking for.

  27. This was one of the most enjoyable Retronauts, actually. Ben1842 has got it all wrong. And the music was frigging awesome! It was the music in the -last- Retronauts before this new one that was unlistenable.

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