The antithesis of wit

Hey, look! My really poorly written Contact review is now online. Now you can see me reiterate the same points as in yesterday’s post, but in a far more verbose fashion. That’s professionalism, folks.

I’m two levels from the end of Yoshi’s Island DS and completely, insanely stuck. And EGM is breathing down my neck for the final score since their pages ship, like, tonight. I’m still vacillating between a (x).0 and a (x+1).0; the game ____ some things __________ ____ (especially _______ the ____ ___ ____ of ___ _______), but there are other parts that _____ ____ and seem ______ and _________ __________. I’m sure you can appreciate my quandary, yes?

Sorry. I can talk freely about Final Fantasy V Advance, though, since I’ve been playing the import version rather than an embargoed reviewable. I had really forgotten how good FFV is. Lots of skills, a breakneck pace and delicious music equals a tough combination to top. Plot? Who needs plot? I have a ninja to train, suckers.

I wonder, though. Is it bad that I always turn Lena into my physical powerhouse character simply because she has the best monk and berserker outfits?

P.S.: Even though most Yoshi’s Island DS information is under embargo, I am allowed to note that it has the most offensive acronym — YIDS — I’ve seen since the days when I did my grocery shopping at H*E*B.

30 thoughts on “The antithesis of wit

  1. I like the little war room, with Shyguys in conference by a chalkboard diagram of Yoshi. “We have met the enemy, and he is, uh, green.”

  2. I am one of the few people in the gaming world that does not own a DS. It isn’t that I do not desire one, it is just that when I would have the opportunity to play a portable game, I am usually reading or studying.

    However, I want Yoshi’s Island after taking a look at the screen shots. That game looks insanely fun.

  3. Oooh, Mad Libs! Man, I didn’t even know there was a Yoshi’s Island DS. I hope it’s no good. I have a hard time resisting Mr. Parish’s DS suggestions, but an even harder time actually making time for my DS. I’m not going to be anywhere near finished with MegaMan ZX by the time I get Contact, which I certainly won’t be done with in time for Scurge, and then FF3, does it ever end?

  4. “does it ever end?”

    No, it doesn’t. The only way to stop is to stop playing games, and that’s clearly not an option. After I got my copy of Cooking Mama a couple of weeks back, I told myself I was finished until the Wii came out. I pop into my local Gamestop last Friday to see how fast the pre-orders went and to at least pre-order my Wii games, and I end up walking out with a copy of FFIV Advance. Which as been worth every penny, but that’s beside the point.

  5. “Is it bad that I always turn Lena into my physical powerhouse character simply because she has the best monk and berserker outfits?”

    Maybe you’re just a progressive thinker.

  6. glad to see that the game is finally seeing a stateside release, despite numerous delays.
    .
    it’s about time the DS got a little bit more variety to it’s RPG selection, especially since it reviewed noticeably better than the last Atlus DS RPG you scored.

  7. I always made Lena a monk for her outfit, and I’m a girl. I’m not sure what this says about me, besides that I obviously played too much SFII with Chun-Li as a child.

    I haven’t even thought about Yoshi’s Island DS lately. Is it worth a purchase at launch, or can I rely on Nintendo manufacturing enough carts to let my wallet recover until after Christmas?

  8. It takes years for Nintendo to let Mario games go out of print. They’re pretty much the most reliable things on the entire market.

  9. Pfff. If you were a rebel you’d break embargos the way you break young fanboys’ hearts.

  10. There should be more inappropriate game titles. Castlevania: Undertaking Night Terrors! Final Fantasy: Ultima Challenge King!

  11. I wonder, though. Is it bad that I always turn Lena into my physical powerhouse character simply because she has the best monk and berserker outfits?

    I always did the same only with monk and samurai, so I don’t think it can be that uncommon a practice.

  12. Alex’s posts just frightened the hell out of me, but not just for his propensity for offensive acronyms. It got me thinking about Nintendo’s fondness for “cute” game naming conventions – where every Nintendo 64 game had that number in the title, or every DS “launch window” game having a DS acronym. Can we expect inappropriate Wii punnery to seep in to their game titling strategy?
    .
    And some news that I hope will please the Atlusian readers – I was going to hold off on buying Contact until payday (mostly because I have a backlog of DS games I’m currently working my way through [I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m playing through Pokemon Mystery Dungeon, amongst others]), but once I found out how much it would cost to microtransact a single night’s gameplay out of Lumines on Xbox Live, I decided that that 30 bucks of game funds would be better spent picking up a launch-week copy.

  13. I’m missing out on COntact because all the review ROMS are out which makes me very sad.

    But Summon Sword 2 should be at my doorstep today, and I can’t wait to get my grubby paws on it.

    Jeremy– if Lena’s your tank, who’s your healing powerhouse?

  14. oh there will be Wii punnery if you know where to look.
    So does that mean we should look forward to it in TC: Second Opinion then Tomm?

  15. We can only hope for Wii punnery in Second Opinion.
    Angie (shocked face): Dr. Stiles! The Wii doesn’t go there!
    Derek (confused): S-sorry Angie…

  16. I assume there will also be talk of his revolutionary surgical technique, much as half the GameCube library had some sort of dolphin reference in it.

  17. Angie (angry): Dr Stiles! This isn’t the place to be waving that thing around in the air like that!
    Derek (annoyed): DAMMIT WOMAN, I CAN’T USE A STYLUS FOR THIS SURGERY! HOW ELSE CAN I DO THIS?! TELEPATHY???

  18. It’s funny you mention that N/A, I have an outtake version of the voice files that goes very similarly to that.

    But it shouldn’t be hard to figure out where to find punnery. I mean, Derek Stiles hung out on the DS didn’t he?

  19. N/A, Tomm works for Atlus, so I wouldn’t assume that any files he has access to are actually publicly available, sadly. Now, if he wanted to give us any presents… ;) …but I’m guessing there’s pretty strict rules on what he’d be allowed to “leak”.

  20. Ahh, that’s both awesome and sucky. Well here is hopin’ Second Opinion has outtakes at the end like Lunar, eh?

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