More E3 crap, because you absolutely didn’t ask for it

I guess that next on the E3 recap agenda is… Microsoft. So. Good work, guys, polite golf claps all around. Unlike Sony, you managed to go all week without shooting your own foot; Gears of War and Mass Effect are generally considered amazing; and that tiny dollop of Halo 3 was enough to ease the sting of that Metal Gear Solid 4 trailer for your loyal fans. Next on your agenda: may I recommend some games that don’t involve armored Marines blowing up things in The Future?

I would like to declare today Totally Sweet Book Day. My copy of JPod — Douglas Coupland’s spiritual follow-up to Microserfs, aka the most important novel of our time — arrived a day early. My copy of Achewood Vol. 6 also arrived, featuring a hand-drawn Roast Beef inside the back cover extolling the virtues of won ton soup. (Apparently it is “hell of grelicious and contains all the food groups.”) And most importantly, I managed to place a pre-order for Scott Pilgrim 3 direct from O’Malley’s website… even though I completely botched the ordering process. He was very nice about it, but talk about embarrassing. Maybe I can follow-up by travelling back in time a few days and wet myself in front of Koji Igarashi or something. (“So you say you’re definitely hoping to incorporate WFC-based co-op play in your new Castlevania?” SPLASH)

Oh well. Anyway, I highly encourage everyone to pick up the new issue of Electronic Gaming Monthly (the white-and-gold Zelda/Revolution cover) — not only does it have some HOTT information on Revolution Wii, I also contributed a few articles which came out looking excellent. The art team rocked the Sega Master System retrospective with a completely bitchin’ grid-style background, and the FFXII preview is pretty much gorgeous. I’m especially happy with the serendipity of the little Gambit System explanation I worked up; I created a diagram using sprites of Locke and Celes from FFVI hacked to resemble Vaan and Fran fighting a Bomb, simply because Vaan was a quick edit from Locke and Fran’s bunny ears and dusky complexion make her look incredibly distinctive, and Bombs are sort of the series’ iconic minor enemy. What I didn’t know is that the exclusive screenshot Square Enix provided also featured Vaan and Fran… fighting a Bomb. This is known as “dumb luck,” and the result is that a great-looking layout is also a tiny masterpiece of visual communication.

If only things worked out that well when I actually plan them.

6 thoughts on “More E3 crap, because you absolutely didn’t ask for it

  1. I’m pretty sure the FBI is keeping a database of people who buy Nice Pete’s book and I’d rather my name not be in it.

  2. I am sure that anyone who has a website on prog rock bands and a permalink to Solid Sharkey is on an FBI list of some kind. Maybe not Dangerous Criminal Masterminds of the Highest Order, but Likely to Break Down, Dress in a Frog Suit and Proclaim Himself “King Vitamin.”

  3. It seems like all this talk about Smash Bros. recently will only expediate Parish’s eventual breakdown. And the first thing I thought after looking at his 1up blog picture was “Jigen”, so he already LOOKS like a dangerous criminal. He probably can’t take much more of this. Shame on you.
    Then again, I rather like Jigen. And I like the idea of Parish exploding helicopters with a revolver. So.
    Smash Bros Smash Bros Smash Bros Advent Children Xenogears Smash Bros

  4. No no no, that picture is obviously Jack Abramoff looking for a rich indian gambling tribe to sell out to.

Comments are closed.